Fic: Under Clothing part 2
Feb. 21st, 2012 09:00 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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hpkinkfestAfter they finish Hogwarts, it only seems right that they join the Order. What started out as whispers and rumours quickly dismissed during their early school years turned into messages, facts, warnings. The Dark Lord was a threat, a big one, and every able witch and wizard needed to do everything in their power to stop him.
The Prophet gets more terrifying every day - the Ministry is now working actively with the Order, co-ordinating raids and protection for those who need it.
Missions start going wrong. Members of the Order get ambushed, taken, tortured. The first few are put down to back luck, bad choices, bad intelligence. They get more paranoid – more vigilant. There is disgruntlement in the ranks. Some members of the Order are convinced they’ve sprung a leak. It’s only Dumbledore’s calm logic and absolute trust in ever Order member that stops a potentially divisive mutiny.
Sirius and James give up their Ministry jobs to become full time Order members. The more time they can devote to their missions for the Order, the more intelligence they can gather, the less likely they are to be ambushed.
Lily joins them soon after moving in with James. Sirius can see how closely they cling to each other - the constant danger making them move through their relationship quicker than they would otherwise.
Peter and Remus keep to part time hours, outside of their jobs. Remus struggles to find anything long term - even if he isn’t honest about his condition, the frequent absences prove more than most employers are willing to put up with. Every time he gets the sack Sirius drags him over to his house and plies him with alcohol until all the bitterness has poured out of Remus.
More often than not Remus ends up flat out on Sirius’ couch, or floor, and they suffer for it in the morning. But Remus’ eyes are a little brighter the next day, his shoulders a little less slumped, and Sirius knows the headache is more than worth it.
"It’s not fair.”
"I know, Padfoot,” James says. They’re sat round James’ kitchen table, looking over their latest orders.
"I just wish he could be a full time member of the Order, like us. He wouldn’t need to worry then.”
"I know, but there’s nothing we can do. It’s not like working for the Order pays a wage. We’re lucky we can afford to, and that I can afford to support Lily to do so as well.”
"We could easily support Remus too.”
"Yeah, I can see how well that would go down.” James snorts. "Remember the jumper incident?”
"Hard to forget it. But he came around in the end? If we just suggest it, maybe? Just throw it out there as an option?”
James snorts, "Good luck to you, mate. I’m not doing it.”
"Thanks for your support, mate.”
"Anytime.”
~~~
"Remus, would you consider becoming a full time member of the Order?”
"You know I’d do it in an instant if I could afford it.”
Sirius pauses, trying to decide the least offensive way of wording his next sentence.
"I hope you’re not going to suggest what I think you’re about to suggest.”
"No, no suggesting. More. Offering? Throwing the idea out there?”
"Sirius.”
"No, Remus, look. I know how you feel about money, I do.” Sirius says over Remus, not wanting to lose his advantage now Remus was listening. "And I would never presume to think you’d want to be supported by any of us,” Remus snorts, "but I do want to put the offer on the table. The Order needs all the support it can get, especially with what’s been going on lately. I’m going to offer Pete the same. James and I can easily support both of you.” Sirius stops and takes a breath. "Just think about it, ok?”
Remus just sighs, and nods.
"Thank you.”
~~~
More people go missing - Muggles, Muggle-borns, even half-bloods are all in danger. There are rumours that Voldemort is making overtures of peace to the Giants, offering who knows what if they join him. The Ministry is crumbling under the pressure of keeping this all underwraps from the Muggles.
In all of this, James proposes to Lily. Sirius is beyond honoured when James asks him to be his best man, and throws himself into the preparations.
The wedding is a wonderful event. Everyone from Hogwarts, the Order, James’ family are all there, and they forget everything, just for an evening.
Sirius is slightly tipsy, and everything is warm and fuzzy around the edges. He snags another glass of champagne from a tray and surveys the room.
Remus looks uncomfortable in his suit. It’s the smartest Sirius has ever seen him and he finds it unusual to look at Remus and not see a single hole in his clothing, or a shiny patch where the fabric is wearing thin. Sirius keeps looking for something, finds that he misses the pale snippets of Remus’s skin.
Sirius goes to sit next to him, watching James and Lily dance. They are completely lost in each other, slowly turning to a Muggle song that Lily adores. He nudges Remus with his shoulder.
"You alright?”
"Yeah. They’re really happy, aren’t they?” Remus replies, smiling fondly.
"They are.” Sirius sighs. The pair of them are ridiculously in love, and Sirius is willing to bet a pretty sickle that it won’t be too long until there’s a little one on the way. Sirius blinks when he realises that Remus is watching him. He turns and raises an eyebrow. Remus just smiles and stands up.
"I’m going to get some air, coming?” Sirius just looks at Remus, trying to fathom out what’s running through his friend’s mind.
They walk out of the hall into the garden. The cool air is wonderful against Sirius’ warm skin, and it’s quieter - the sounds of the party are muffled, making it feel farther away. Floating candles are dotted around the garden, giving the place a soft glow. The ceremony had been out here, under a brilliant blue sky. The rose bushes were in bloom and bees had lazily been buzzing from bloom to bloom.
"Padfoot?” Sirius jumps out of his reverie.
"Sorry, Moony. Got a bit lost there.” Sirius says, turning to Remus, who’s not two foot away.
"Don’t hurt yourself, thinking too hard.” Remus takes a step forward, and another. Sirius stomach clenches and everything seems sharper.
"Hilarious.” Sirius replies weakly. Remus is so close that Sirius can smell Remus’ cologne. He sways forward slightly, before he can stop himself, and Remus’ hand comes to rest on his forearm.
"I know I am.” Remus is whispering, and seems as distracted as Sirius. "Sirius,” his name is like a sigh on Remus’ lips.
"Remus, I-”
"I think it’s time, don’t you?” And Remus leans forward and kisses him. Remus tastes like the rich wine they served with dinner, and Sirius chases the taste with his tongue. Remus is warm, so warm, and Sirius curls his fingers into Remus’ jacket, holding him near. A hand come up to cup Sirius’ jaw, cold fingers stroking his cheek gently.
Remus pulls back with a huff, but doesn’t move away. His hand moves to the nape of Sirius’ neck, fingers curling through Sirius’ hair almost absent-mindedly, making him shiver.
Remus sighs, and looks back at the hall regretfully.
"We have to go back in there.”
Sirius groans and buries his head in Remus’ shoulder. He gets slightly distracted by Remus’ skin, the tickle of Remus’ hair against his nose. He mouths at the soft skin there,
"Sirius, no.” Remus shifted, "look. We can’t. Not yet.”
Sirius pulled back and sighed.
"Poor timing?”
"Yeah, sorry.” Remus says, stepping away. "Don’t want to steal their thunder.”
"You do realise they have all got bets on this, right? We’ll make someone rich.”
Remus laughs, slightly hysterically, and covers his face with his hands. Sirius wraps his arms around him, giggling.
"Ok, right. So. Drink.” Sirius declares, squeezing Remus a bit, a little addicted to touching now that he could. Sirius didn’t see why he’d want to stop.
"Not too much. You’re already tipsy and I have plans for you that don’t involve carrying you home.”
Sirius swallows hard at the implication of Remus’ words.
"Ok, not too many drinks.” He agrees readily. They stand for a moment, just gazing at each other. Sirius can’t form words, not now this tension has been acknowledged.
"Right, so...” Remus says, similarly incoherent. "Drink.”
"Yeah.” Sirius forces himself to walk towards the hall.
~~~
They finally get to Sirius’ place, and Sirius can barely get the door shut before he grabs Remus. He pulls him into a kiss, Remus responds beautifully, groaning and fisting his hands into Sirius’ coat.
"Shit, ok. Clothes.” Remus says as he pulls away. He fumbles with Sirius’ coat, dropping it to the floor.
Sirius pulls at Remus’ jacket, then attacks the buttons of his shirt. His arms get caught up with Remus, who’s trying to undo Sirius’ clothing. They tangle for a moment, stubborn and stupid with lust and alcohol. Sirius wins and manages to get Remus’ shirt off. He’s wearing a scruffy undershirt. There’s a hole at the collar, and Sirius swallows hard.
Remus doesn’t seem to notice Sirius’ distraction and tugs at Sirius’ trousers, pulling them down to pool at his ankles. Sirius manages to clamber out of the garments without falling on his arse, watching Remus divest himself of his shirt.
Sirius watches greedily as more and more of Remus’ skin is revealed. His shoulders are freckly, and his has a smattering of hair on his chest.
He’s also scarred. His chest and torso are littered with them. Some of the scars are neat scratch marks, others are more ragged. There’s a mess of scar tissue on the left side of Remus’ torso. It must be the scar the bite left, Sirius realises, the one that turned Remus into a Werewolf.
Sirius pulls his eyes back up to meet Remus’. He realises that Remus is nervous, expecting Sirius to be – disgusted maybe? That Sirius has never seen it before is testament to Remus’ ability to change and put on clothes with startling speed.
Sirius decides that actions speak louder than words – especially when it comes to this sort of reassurance - and crowds Remus against the wall, kissing along his jaw.Sirius runs his hand down Remus’ chest, fingers playing across his ribs. When Sirius reaches Remus’ trousers he opens them and tugs them down.
Remus is erect, the head is just peeping through the slit of his boxers. Sirius makes a noise at the back of his throat and drops to his knees. He mouths at Remus’ cock, soaking the fabric of the boxers.
Remus hisses, hands coming to rest on Sirius’ shoulders. Sirius sucks at the head, which is now free of the boxers. He slips his hands up Remus’ thighs, under the legs of Remus’ boxers, stroking the sensitive skin there. Remus whimpers and tugs at Sirius’ shoulders.
"Wait, wait.” Sirius pulls away reluctantly, allowing Remus to help him stand. The first touch of Remus’ fingers against his aching erection burns through the his arousal, sharpening it.
"I want to fuck you.”
Sirius chokes out something like a yes then starts moving towards the bedroom.
He feels cool, slick fingers breach him and he arches, his body wanting away from the burn but more of the stretch. Remus runs a hand up and down Sirius’ thigh, making soothing noises.
"Come on, Remus,” Sirius pants, twisting the sheets in his hands.
"Yes, ok.” Sirius whimpers as he feels Remus pull his fingers out. The mattress dips as Remus moves closer and Sirius can feel Remus’ skin against the back of his legs. Remus’ cock drags along his hole and they both groan.
Remus pushes in slowly. Sirius loses all the breath in his lungs as he feels himself stretch.
Remus shifts and thrusts back in, and Sirius sees stars. He digs his fingers into Remus’ arms and vaguely thinks he should write Inglebee a thank you note. Remus hisses and thrusts harder, making the headboard hit the wall. Remus starts giggling, ducking his head. Sirius can feel himself grin, runs a hand through Remus’ hair.
"Alright, ok.” Remus gasps, thrusting deeply once more.
"Nnng. Yeah.” Sirius says, arching into the thrusts.
Sirius curls up, moving his arms to cling to Remus, pulling him closer. Sirius’ cock is trapped between their stomachs, grinding against skin with every thrust. Remus’ is losing his rhythm, shorter thrusts now.
Sirius can feel pleasure warm at the base of his spine. Sirius sinks his teeth into Remus’ shoulder as he comes, muscles tightening. Remus all but growls in response and thrusts hard before letting go deep in Sirius’ body.
They melt together, panting. Remus rolls off him and stares up at the ceiling.
"So that went well.”
Remus blinks, then bursts into laughter.
"Yes, I’d agree with that.”
~~~
Remus is wearing a teeshirt with a hole in the shoulder. Sirius notices, obviously. When Remus turns his neck, the hole shifts just a little. The skin that’s revealed is slightly blue-ish.
Sirius spends a fair while thinking back over the past few days, trying to figure out when Remus got that bruise. Eventually Sirius realises that the mark is from when he bit Remus at the point of orgasm, and the rest of the meeting passes in a bit of a haze.
As soon as the meeting is over Sirius grabs Remus and shoves him into a cupboard.
"Sirius, what-” Sirius places a hand over Remus’ mouth.
"Shush, they’ll hear you.”
"What are you doing, you lunatic?” Remus hisses.
"This teeshirt has a hole here.” Sirius pokes the hole, "and I can see where I marked you last night.”
"Oh.” Remus says.
"It’s so bloody sexy I can hardly see straight.” Sirius explains, dropping to his knees and starting to undo Remus’ fly. Remus gasps as his cock starts to harden.
"Shush,” Sirius admonishes again. Remus runs his fingers through Sirius’ hair, curling the strands around his fingers, like Sirius is a much loved item of clothing. Something to be fiddled with. Sirius makes a choked noise and leans forward, placing kisses on the soft skin of Remus’ stomach.
"Oh, Sirius.” Remus hisses, twisting his hands tighter into Sirius’ hair. "We could cast a silencing charm, you know.”
"Where would be the fun in that?” Sirius replies, grinning up at Remus, and pulling out his half hard cock. Remus curses under his breath.
~~~
Sirius doesn’t realises he’s on his feet until he feel James’ hands on his shoulders, forcing him still.
"Sirius, calm down.”
"No! I won’t listen to it!”
"Because you’re so unbiased, aren’t you, Black?” Prewett has got a smug smile that Sirius very much wants to smack off his face. Sirius know’s that Dumbledore’s current absence and the latest bout of failed missions and ambushes have got everyone on tenterhooks, but out-rightly accusing Remus of treachery is beyond reasonable.
"That’s out of line, Prewett.” James says sharply, pushing Sirius down into his seat.
"People are dying, and we have a spy. We need to look at the possibilities.”
"And Remus just happens to be your first thought.”
"Look, all I’m saying is Voldemort counts the Werewolves as his allies.”
"Remus isn’t one of them. He’d never betray the Order.”
"It’s not just that. He’s refusing to be a full time member of the Order.”
"He can’t afford to, you know that.”
"You could afford to, Black, you don’t hide your money.”
"Doesn’t mean Remus wants to live off my charity.” Especially not now we’re in a relationship Sirius thinks, remembering their last fight. I’m not a whore, Sirius! Remus had shouted, before disappearing for a good couple of hours. Sirius had taken great pains to remind himself that it was Remus’ bad time of the month, and the eventual make-up sex had been amazing.
"This is pointless. All you’ve got is speculation. Not a shred of evidence.” James points out.
"Then a test wouldn’t be an issue?”
"What kind of test, exactly?”
"Your latest orders just came through.” Prewett dropped a piece of parchment on the table, "mission next Monday. Don’t tell Lupin. See what happens.” Prewett says with a shrug. "If it goes well, Lupin isn’t a spy and I’ll apologise. If it goes wrong, well...we’ll have to deal with him, won’t we?”
Sirius fumes silently. His first reaction is to refuse - Remus isn’t a spy and why should he have to keep secrets to allay some stupid people’s fears?
On the other hand, if it does make people realise the truth, the whole thing would disappear, hopefully forever.
"Alright. I’ll do it.”
~~~
"I’m not sure this is a good idea, Padfoot.”
"I’m hardly jumping for joy about it, either. But I’m not sure what else to do. Refusing would just look bad - Prewett’s like a centaur when he gets an idea in his head.”
James sighs and runs a hand through his hair.
"It just feels wrong.”
"I know, I know.” Sirius says, guilt twisting his stomach. "But we know Remus is innocent, so it’ll be fine.”
"There’s no guarantee that we’ll be ambushed anyway. It’s not every mission.”
"The whole thing is ridiculous. But there’s no other option.”
"First time I’ve ever wanted to be ambushed on one of these things.” Sirius says darkly, clambering onto his bike. "I’ll see you at the weekend - I’ll come to yours to do the prep for the mission.”
"Yeah, see you then.”
Sirius waves, then kickstarts the bike, not even the exhilaration of flying his pride and joy putting a smile on his face.
That night Sirius lies awake, staring at the ceiling. Remus is curled up next to him, snoring softly. Sirius replays the last meeting over and over in his head. He can already feel Remus getting alienated from the rest of the Order, and Sirius is pretty sure this mission won’t change a thing.
~~~
As soon as Remus appears in Sirius’ living room, Sirius can tell he’s been sacked again. Biting his tongue against the familiar arguments and frustration, he simply wraps his arms around Remus.
"No alcohol in the house, I’m afraid.” Sirius whispers in Remus hair.
Remus huffs a laugh.
"I’ll survive somehow,” Remus pulls away and leans up for a kiss. Sirius obliges, lifting a hand to curl around Remus’ face. This kiss turns dirty, Remus running his tongue along Sirius’ lips. Sirius groans softly and pulls Remus closer.
"Hmm, come on, no alcohol, but I can think of another way to cheer you up.” Sirius leers when they part. He’s delighted when Remus laughs properly.
"Well, who am I to refuse such an offer? Lead the way.”
Sirius tugs Remus up the stairs.
~~~
"We’re going onto hiding.” Lily says, hands curling around a mug. "Voldemort is going to come after Harry, and we’re not going to allow that to happen.”
"We’re going to use the Fidelius Charm.” James adds, "Sirius, we want you to be the secret keeper.”
Sirius blinks in shock, looking between the two of them.
"Well, of course, anything, you know that.”
"Dumbledore’s hoping to use the Prophecy against Voldemort, but he’s advised us to not get involved.”
"When?”
"Soon, in a couple of weeks. We’ve just got a few more arrangements to make.”
Lily reaches out a hand and grasps Sirius’ arm. "Thank you, for agreeing. It means a lot to us.”
"Are you sure you don’t want to think it over some more, Padfoot?”
"Nah, mate.” Sirius says with conviction. He’s more than willing to do this for them - especially now he has a godson, something that awes and terrifies him on a regular basis. No thought needed.
~~~
"How goes the job search?”
"Slowly,” Remus says, rubbing his hand over his face. "There’s nothing out there. I could look for a Muggle job - maybe talk to Lily.”
"Seems a bit redundant though - doing a job a Muggle could do.”
"Well, I’m running out of options.”
"You do have another option.”
"I thought we agreed not to talk about this, Sirius.”
"I know, I just.” Sirius sighs and gives up.
~~~
Sirius bites his lip and knocks on the Potter’s door. Lily welcomes him in with a smile and Harry reaches out to him from her arms.
"Hello little man. How are you today?”
"Better than he was. You were very grumpy this morning, weren’t you, Harry?” Harry gurgles.
"James is out in the back garden, getting wood for the fire, he should be in soon.”
"I might go get him. I need to talk to you both.” Lily turns and look at him. Sirius tries not to squirm too much - Lily is far too perceptive sometimes.
"Alright. Go and find him and I’ll make us some tea.”
When Sirius opens the back door, he sees James carrying a huge pile of wood. Until James’ gets closer, then Sirius sees that he only looks like he’s carrying it. The wood is actually floating just above his arms. Despite himself, Sirius grins and snorts.
"Don’t knock it. This is enough to avoid any suspicion, and all the other villagers are a little scared of me.” James says as he reaches Sirius. "Out the way, then. I need to get inside.”
Sirius steps back and let James in, watching him put the wood into the cupboard.
"So, what’s wrong?”
"Can we go sit with Lily? I want to talk to you both.” Sirius walks into the living room. He needs to get this all out in one go, it’s hard enough as it is.
James and Lily share a significant look as they sit on the sofa. Sirius stands in front of the fire facing them and takes a deep breath.
"I want you make Peter your Secret Keeper.”
There’s a moment of complete silence. The couple looks at each other again.
"Is this about Remus?”
"I - not entirely.” Sirius took another deep breath, closing his eyes against the sympathy he can see in their eyes. He doesn’t want to think about Remus, not in this context. "I just think it would be better - no one would come after Peter. I can keep an eye on him and run deflection. It makes more sense.”
"Well, I think we’ll need to think about it,” James turns to Lily. "What do you think?”
"Yes, I - we’ll think about it.”
"Don’t tell anyone - it’s a worthless switch if you do. The whole reason this will work is they’ll have no reason to think I won’t be your Secret Keeper.” Sirius says, focusing on the plan, the tactics. If he focuses on the tactics behind the move rather than the reasons for the tactics, it’s easier. "And we’ll need to talk to Peter.”
~~~
The alternate plans are laid, and Sirius swallows his guilt. It’s for the greater good, even if - even though - Remus isn’t a traitor. It’s the perfect switch, he tells himself.
~~~
Sirius is worried. Really worried. He looks around the safe house he’d holed Peter up in. It’s empty. Peter shouldn’t be going out - that’s not in the agreement.
Sirius re-checks all the rooms again. The house look fine, no sign of a struggle, and Peter isn’t completely incompetent at duelling, so if he was attacked he’s get a few curses out...
The bottom drops out of Sirius’ stomach. James, Lily, Harry, oh fuck. He needs to find them, or Peter, or (preferably) both. He thinks about calling for help, discards it - everyone will take too long. He’ll deal with the fall out later, when everyone’s safe. He’ll deal with the recriminations and the apologies (Oh, Merlin, he owes Remus so many apologies) later. But right now, he’s got a job to do. Course or action decided on, Sirius Apparates.
~~~
There is some kind of irony in the fact that when they next meet, Sirius' clothes are far more ragged than Remus' ever were. His clothes barely cover him, hanging in tatters. When Remus pulls him into a hug, he can feel a pad of a finger, a sweep of a nail through various holes. Sirius shudders, his skin tingling from the warmth and the feel of skin on his after so long.
It’s all Sirius can do not to melt into the embrace, never to resurface. However, there are more important things on his mind. There will be time to worry about clothes when he’s free.
And then it all goes to pot.
~~~
Sirius makes his way up the garden path, the ache in his feet growing more intense now he can see the cottage. He shrugs deeper into the cloak as he passes under the streetlamp, not wanting to ruin things now he’s so close.
He walks up the path and knocks on the door. The cottage is ramshackle, the garden more weeds than anything else. Sirius is startled from his thoughts when the door swings open.
"Sirius. Come in. Dumbledore told me you’d be heading my way.” Remus pulls Sirius in the cottage and shuts the door quickly, locking it behind them. Sirius lets out a gasp as he’s pulled into a hug. Sirius wraps his arms around Remus, shamelessly tucking his nose into Remus’ neck and breathing him in.
"It’s good to see you,” Remus says, pulling back, Sirius reluctantly lets him go. Remus leads the way into the living room and Sirius all but collapses on the sofa. It’s old and threadbare and perfect.
Sirius watches Remus nervously potter around, poking at the fire and lighting more candles.
"It’s not much,” he says as brings Sirius a bowl of soup. Sirius inhales the steam coming from the bowl. There are actual vegetables in the soup, something Sirius never thought he’d be glad about. The first spoonful almost scalds his mouth, and causes his stomach to cramp a bit, still not quite used to a hot meal.
"It’s perfect. Much better than rat and squirrel.”
Remus snorts a laugh. "Sorry, probably shouldn’t laugh.”
Sirius just grins and tucks into his soup, licking the bowl clean.
"Second helping?”
"Mm, no. I think I need a bath, actually.”
"Well, I didn’t like to say anything.”
"Oi!” Sirius throws the spoon at Remus, who deftly catches it.
"Bath’s up here. I can try and find you some other clothes. At least something to sleep in.” Remus leads the way up the stairs. "I can head into town to get you some new clothes tomorrow.”
The bathroom is tiny - barely enough room for the bath. Sirius starts running hot water, holding his hand in the swirling water. The roaring is almost deafening, and he jumps when Remus taps on the door.
"You decent?” Remus calls through the closed door.
"I’m never decent, Moony.”
There’s a tut and the door opens.
"Here. Not much but better than what you’re wearing. I’ll have to go and get you some new clothes tomorrow.” Remus hands over a pair of faded pajamas. The flannel is bobbly with wear.
"Thank you, Remus.”
"You’re welcome. I’ll leave you to it, shall I?” Remus closes the door behind him. Sirius takes a deep breath and strips off. He sinks into the bath, groaning as he melts into the hot water. He actually cannot remember his last hot bath.
His closes his eyes and lets himself drift.
Sirius jumps awake, flailing as he slips in the water, inhaling a mouthful of tepid bathwater.
"Wha-”
"Sirius?” Remus was calling through the door.
"Yeah, sorry. Fell asleep.” Sirius manages to choke out.
Remus huffs. "Idiot.”
"I’ll be down in a minute - water’s gone cold.”
"I’m not surprised, given how long you’ve been in there,” Remus says, wryly.
Sirius gets out of the bath, dries off and picks up the pajamas. The pajamas smell of Remus’ soap. The sleeves are too short, but the torso drowns him. There are holes in the knees, and even these cuffs have a hole. Sirius is disappointed that he can’t slip his thumbs through them.
He walks down the stairs, shuddering as a blast of heat from the living room hits him, warmer where there are holes, letting the heat in.
Remus is in another pair of pajamas, kneeling by the fire. The top has ridden up, revealing a stripe of skin, flickering golden in the candlelight. The resulting jab of arousal is shocking. Sirius swallows hard.
He must have made a noise, because Remus looks up. He takes in Sirius fully, and stands up. Remus has lost a button from his top - the bottom one, Sirius can just glimpse his belly button - and Sirius can’t decide if it’s wrong to be aroused by Remus’ belly button or not.
"The pajamas fit. Ish.” Remus gestures awkwardly.
"Yes, thank you.” Sirius replies, one hand pulling at the bottom of his top.
Sirius crosses the room to stand in front of Remus, and wraps a hand around the back of his neck. Remus gasps and his hands come to catch Sirius’ waist.
"Sirius...” Remus says, and Sirius knows he’s going to say something stupidly sensible about waiting and seeing and because it’s been thirteen years, and things have changed. Sirius knows this, but he doesn’t want to wait, he’s waited far too long, and the future’s far too uncertain for him to wait any longer.
"I’ve wasted far too much time already.” Sirius says, pulling Remus in for a kiss.
And it’s not perfect - Sirius is clumsy after so long. Sirius palms Remus’ stomach through the gap, feeling how it’s warmer there from being exposed to the fire. Remus hums in response, fingers curling through Sirius’ hair.
They stumble their way upstairs and Remus pushes Sirius onto the bed. They stop and change tack and start again, wanting everything all at once.
Sirius had almost forgotten what arousal felt like, the shocking heat of it curling through his stomach, his blood pounding in his ears. The feeling of yielding and stretching around Remus left him dizzy and breathless, clinging to the sheets.
He comes with a wordless shout, his come splashing between them. Remus spills himself shuddering inside Sirius, and all but collapses on top of Sirius.
They manage to rearrange themselves with shaking limbs and Sirius curls himself into Remus’ side, feeling the sweat dry on his skin. Remus is tracing the lines of a tattoo on Sirius’ arm.
"Do you think they’ll be another war?”
"Probably. Voldemort’s back, so I imagine Dumbledore will restart to Order.”
Remus sighs and pulls Sirius closer for another kiss. "Best make the most of this bit of peace, then.”
Sirius huffs a laugh in response and returns the kiss, running his hands over Remus’ skin.
~~~
The Order is re-instated, and Remus becomes a full time member. They have a long hard talk about trust and openness, which leaves Sirius feeling raw and on edge, and wanting nothing more than to hide from the world. But then there’s Harry, so strong for someone so young, who reminds him more of James every day, and a good community of people who believe in his innocence - even if they view him with mistrust at first.
Through it all there’s Rems, who cajoles and laughs and shouts at him, who still wears jumpers with holes at the cuff and split seams, even though Sirius half-heartedly offered to buy him clothes when he re-stocked his own wardrobe. Remus had just smirked and told Sirius that he liked wearing his old scruffy clothes, and didn’t Sirius enjoy them?
Sirius had punched Remus and called him a mongrel, and traced a rent in the thigh of Remus’ jeans, stroking the pale skin that showed through.
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